You Blew It

Have you ever had the revelation “I blew it”? You forgot your homework, you didn’t proofread a paper, you were late for the wrong meeting, you over slept…I could go on and on. At some point in our lives we have consequences that are of our own fault. You can’t blame a soul. If you haven’t had that..well lets say ima pray Jesus shows you…lol.

Everyone messes up. This week I messed up. Yesterday to be exact. I hit a curb and took out two of my tires and a rim. Maybe even more I haven’t gotten the full “assessment” yet. Regardless I underestimated the width of a turning lane and BAM my whole day took a turn. 

I could go through all the negative but honestly today I am here because I actually saw a lot of good

Someone in the Bible stuck out to me today.

David. 

A man after Gods own heart. He blew it. He stayed home during a season he knew he should have been at battle and succumbed to temptation and sinned. (2 Samuel 11:1-4) That one sin, brought on more sin and consequences. He only had himself to blame. 

Man Emily, that took a turn quick…

I know, I know its dark and twisty, but there is light! David repented and God knew Davids heart. It was pure. This story gives me hope because our faults and “I blew it” moments don’t define us. God does. 
So I hit a curb, I probably should have been paying closer attention, but I learned some good lessons from my own folly and also now looking at the life of David. 

It could always be worse

I work in a not so safe part of town, and I could have easily hit a curb there and been quite fearful for my well being. I did not. I was close to a business and the owner actually changed my tire (Thanks Ryan, at Jeffco Monroe pictured below)

Bathsheba became pregnant as a result of David’s affair. He chose to continue to sin by having Bethsheba’s husband placed on front lines of battle and subsequently he died. (2 Samuel 11: 14-17). He did at least try to have Uriah sleep with Bathsheba first before he jumped to murder but was unsuccessful. 

What if Uriah had slept with Bathsheba? This would have successfully covered up the pregnancy, but years and years of shame would have followed David and things would not have gone the same way. Solomon is a result of a subsequent union between David and Bathsheba- God takes what the enemy meant for evil and turns it for good (Gen 50:20)

You need good people in your life

Boy am I glad for great people! One of my coworkers selflessly spent hours helping me get sorted out with my car until my husband could get there. Thank you Larrie Butler, you’re the bomb.

David had Nathan
When Nathan confronted David with his story in 2 Samuel 12. David then wrote Psalms 51
“Have mercy on me, O God, according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly and cleanse me from my sin” psalm 51:1-2 (go read the rest, its great”
It is a beautiful penitential Psalm. 

There are lessons in our mistakes

I don’t consider myself a bad driver, but I was unprepared for vehicle related mishaps. I legit didn’t know what to do after this happened. I didn’t even know where my spare tire was. I called my husband, I called my dad and I called roadside assistance. I know it’s a first world problem, but in that moment I felt so ignorant. As a CRNA, My job is to always be prepared for the catastrophes that can happen. I am a pro-active person in all things, so not being prepared for this I was completely out of my element. 

BUT GOD

Throughout all of this, God gave me peace and He helped me see little glimpses of Him all throughout the day. I had a renewed sense of “good people”. 

“Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit. Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will return to you” Psalm 51: 12-13

David was renewed and he was already seeing a way to take what he did wrong to help future generations. He still is! His sin had consequences that effected a few generations, but his repentence contained a covenant that effected all future generations. 

Are you carrying around shame and guilt of the past? You’ve made decisions and consequences came, but now it’s time to let the shame go. Ask God to restore the joy of your salvation. Bring life back to your dry bones. No matter what has happened God can turn it around and use it for good.

My Father in heaven, Holy is your name. Lord I pray that all obstacles are removed that prevent these readers from knowing your truth. I pray our wants and your will align. I pray you would give us provision and sustenance. Lord forgive us where we have failed you and protect us from the evil one and his tactics Lord restore in each of your children the joy of your salvation. Thank You for you son Jesus. In his name we pray amen. 

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